The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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