I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
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